Good Friday

So for the first time in a while I'm at my parents for a more than a day. As with every other time here, the offer is open to attend church. Since it's Easter I thought, why not? I mean, this was my childhood teaching, and the church has recently undergone a rebuild.

I guess I somehow thought that this church must be preaching the message I have learned over all those years... but I guess that message was learned on my own, because sitting there and listening to that sermon, I couldn't even see where my own thoughts fitted in.

It was probably in the moment that the preacher said that those who didn't embrace Jesus would go to hell that I sat and stared and thought, "I no longer fit here." Because they may believe that, but saying it is where all the damn separationism starts. It makes Christianity a religion on "them" and "us".

For a religion that supposedly preaches inclusion there's an awful lot of the contrary. And when it starts in churches how are the followers supposed to think otherwise? I mean, every one of us should question our own beliefs, embrace them sure, but at least think for your damn self.

If I were to follow one man's words blindly I'd be trying to convert everyone I saw, trying to tell them that life was good and that they could be fixed. For all I know that might be true, but I have no idea what those other people have been through. No idea about their thoughts and feelings or even if they're ready for that kind of message. I think it's extremely presumptuous to tell someone what they should and shouldn't do, how they should and shouldn't live, because you can never really know how someone feels because we all have completely different perceptions of everything.

If you actually take the time to read the message of the new testament, it doesn't say anything about loving everyone except these select groups, and it sure as hell doesn't say anything about them and us. It says everyone, everyone was saved by Jesus dying, so why is there the them and us thing going on all these thousands of years later?

To be honest, sitting there in that building made me wonder how I stuck with it so long. I believe in God, and the message and stuff, but not the way they teach it.

Those who follow with their eyes shut are fools.