The Return Of Religion

Religion has always been a bit of a strange thing to me; throughout the years I have never wavered from believing that there is a God, nor that S/He is benevolent (my upbringing could be the key to this as I was brought up in a Christian environment with supporting and loving parents), but sometimes my faith in God to bring the best into my life has broken. This happened almost eight years ago, and I have been trying to recover from it ever since.

To tell the truth, my choice in boyfriends hasn't really helped the situation; both of the big relationships being with boys who didn't believe and let me know it, I wasn't really in the best of places with God, not when the most influential person in my life was cynical about religion. This, coupled with my loss in faith of the people in the church I used to go to, has made mending my belief structure extremely difficult, it's no wonder I haven't managed it.

But now, with the new addition of a partner who actually knows and loves God, my faith is starting to re-emerge. It'll take time, I know, to be able to talk about it freely, or sing about it, or not get embarrassed when people pray in front of the non-Christians I know, but I'll get there. For the time being I have begun with baby-steps and taken up praying occasionally. I still feel like they metaphorically hit the roof and don't really go anywhere, but I'll get past that eventually. All I really need to do is persevere, and with Mark as my partner I don't think that's an issue, he'll support me no matter what I do, and already tells me he appreciates the effort and he believes God does too.

Well that's it for this Sunday's post, dear readers.
Installment 3 of my desk items should be coming soon.